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THE AMITYVILLE HORROR
Review by Michael Jacobson
Stars:
Ryan Reynolds, Melissa George, Philip Baker Hall
Director: Andrew Douglas
Audio: Dolby Digital 5.1
Video: Anamorphic Widescreen 2.35:1
Studio: MGM
Features: See Review
Length: 89 Minutes
Release Date: October 4, 2005
"...kill
them..."
The
Amityville Horror was a story that became the sensation of its time.
It was the tale of George and Kathy Lutz, her three children, and a dog.
They moved into a beautiful Long Island home where, a while back, a teen
had gone crazy and murdered his entire family.
28 days after moving in, they fled, never reclaiming their possessions.
Their story of supernatural horror became a bestselling novel, and
eventually, a hit film.
The
problem was, of course, that it was all a hoax. Not that it matters when it comes to weaving a scary tale
(see: Blair Witch Project),
but I feel compelled to bring it up because the remake begins "Based on the
True Story". Then, watching
the extras, everyone involved in the film are obviously STILL trying to sell us
on the premise that the tale is true, even though it was proven false decades
ago and the Lutzes admitted their deception.
They're like those people who still say there was no Saddam Hussein/al
Qaeda connection, even though dozens of links have been indisputably documented.
What
makes people try to deceive the masses in the face of overwhelming evidence of
truth? In the case of this movie,
it might have been the knowledge that they didn't end up with much of a final
product. If the filmmakers could
therefore convince a few unsuspecting, gullible people that the chilling tale
was based on reality, it might equate to a few more dollars that would have
otherwise gone by the wayside.
I
knew when I saw the original Amityville Horror that the story was a
fakery. What did it matter?
It was still one of the scariest films I'd ever seen.
Still is. By the time that
movie came out, the hoax had been stripped bare...yet horror films don't need
something flimsy like a "supposed" true story to get them connected.
They just want to be frightened out of their wits, spill their popcorn,
and grip the hand of the attractive person sitting next to them.
The
remake of The Amityville Horror offers none of those pleasures, so even
IF the story were as true as they purport it to be, it wouldn't matter.
The illusions within the film fail, so the illusions outside of it are
rendered impotent. It proves
nothing new...though it does seem to reiterate the point that remakes of classic
horror movies are often answers to questions nobody asked.
Think of Dawn of the Dead or Texas Chainsaw Massacre, but
not even at the level of those.
George
(Reynolds) and Kathy (George) are newly married and starting a family with her
three kids from a previous marriage. When
they stumble across the great façade of the house in Amityville, it seems like
a blessing, especially considering the unbelievable deal.
But things go awry, as a terrible presence once blamed for causing a
multiple murder in the house seems still alive and well, and ready to wreak
havoc on the new family. They say a
man's home is his castle, but this is one palace that's about to turn upside
down thanks to the madness of King George.
It's
not an exact copy of the original movie...in fact, one or two ideas seem
pleasantly fresh, and expand on ideas hinted at in the first film.
Others are weak attempts to re-invent.
The original opening gave us the back story of the murders with a shot of
the outside of the house and flashes of light in the windows.
Simple, yet chilling. But
the new version actually shows the murders in graphic detail.
Bloodier? Yes.
Scarier? More effective?
Neither
But
there are other problems galore. There
is no rhythm here. First time
feature director Andrew Douglas came from music videos and commercials, and his
chop-chop approach to assembling footage is on full display here.
Only one sequence truly built suspense...a little rooftop adventure that
was well crafted and put together.
The
rest of the film plays like a journey without a map...there's a point A and a
point B, but no clear cut way to get from one to the other.
I never quite bought Ryan Reynolds as mad and dangerous.
I guess he just lacked that quietly unfocused and menacing quality James
Brolin had. Melissa George is
lovely but bland. I don't know how
much to fault the actors...the creators just gave them a dry lemon and asked
them to squeeze some juice out of it.
Unlike
its predecessor, The Amityville Horror remake won't haunt my dreams or
keep my nerves jangled. It barely
made a dent in my memory cells. I'll
probably be remembering the fact that the filmmakers tried to make me believe in
a "true story" long proved false longer than I remember the actual
movie.
Video
****
No
complaints here...the anamorphic widescreen transfer from MGM is first rate from
start to finish. A lot of the movie
takes place in dark or lowly lit areas, yet the images come across clean and
clear with no undue grain or compression evident. Very tricky to do...yet here, it's done superbly.
Audio
****
Sound
is everything in a good horror flick (or even a bad one), and this 5.1 mix is
sensational. The constant creaks of
the house keep you in the action, while the subwoofer adds menacing bass.
All directional channels are employed to great effect.
Dynamic range is quite strong, and spoken words are clean and clear
throughout. Top notch.
Features
***1/2
This
disc boasts a number of good extras. For
starters, you get a commentary with Ryan Reynolds (as I suspected, he's far too
nice to be a raving madman) along with the producers.
It's an enjoyable listen. There
are also 8 deleted scenes, a photo gallery, multi-angle on-set peeks, and two
featurettes. One is on the original
Amityville murders, another is a look at the making of the film.
Summary:
