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SCARY MOVIE 3.5
Review by Gordon Justesen
Stars:
Anna Faris, Anthony Anderson, Leslie Nielsen, Camryn Manheim, Simon Rex, George
Carlin, D.L. Hughley, Queen Latifah, Eddie Griffin, Denise Richards, Regina
Hall, Charlie Sheen
Director: David Zucker
Audio: Dolby Digital 5.1, French Dolby Surround
Video: Anamorphic Widescreen 1.85:1
Studio: Dimension
Features: See Review
Length: 85 Minutes
Release Date: September 20, 2005
“These
men died for their country. Send flowers to their bitches and ho’s.”
Film
***
What an interesting
route the Scary Movie franchise has
traveled. The first installment, released in 2000, was one of the funniest spoof
movies to come around since Airplane
twenty years before it. The following year saw Scary Movie 2, which was one of the worst sequels of its kind since,
well, Airplane II: The Sequel. Now
comes Scary Movie 3, which has brought
this spoof series back on its feet.
For this
installment, the torch has been passed from the Wayans team over to director
David Zucker, one of the very innovators of the spoof movie, following Mel
Brooks, of course. Zucker, one of the directors of Airplane and The Naked Gun,
was the downright perfect choice to take over this franchise. For Part 3, Zucker
and his writers have done the right thing, by toning down the extremely crude
jokes and upgrading the simple visual gags and dumb jokes; the very elements
that made spoof movies what they are in the first place.
As one could guess,
Scary Movie 3 takes full aim on every
popular scary movie to come in the two years since Scary Movie 2. The one taking the most hits is The Ring (the opening segment of that one is sent up hilariously
with Pamela Anderson and Jenny McCarthy), and Zucker and his writers have a lot
of fun in poking fun at that movie’s every possible target. Two other movies
that are given equal doses of spoof shots are 8 Mile, The Matrix Reloaded and M. Night Shyamalan’s Signs
(the very character that Shyamalan played in that movie is spoofed, named simply
Sayaman).
At the center of
the action, once again, is Cindy Campbell (Anna Faris), now a news anchor for
Washington D.C.’s leading morning news program, “The Morning News”. Upon
reporting that there have been possible alien sightings in a nearby farmer’s
cornfield, she requests to her boss that she investigate deeper, but her boss
only wants them to report stories involving sex and people being killed by
natural disasters.
Meanwhile, the
resident of the farm, former priest Tom Logan (Charlie Sheen), has an additional
problem to be concerned about. His younger brother, George (Simon Rex), has a
dream, which is to simply have a dream. He actually wants to win an upcoming a
rap battle with the help of his promoter, Mahalik (Anthony Anderson).
For Cindy, her
suspicions of possible alien activity only increase when she comes into
possession of a mysterious videotape (featuring a laugh-out-loud parody of the
video footage from The Ring). She then
receives a phone call telling her that she will die in seven days, not seven
business days but seven days starting right then. Her investigation of the
videotape leads her to a lighthouse resembling a cigarette, where she gets
strange explanations The Oracle, Aunt Shaneequa (Queen Latifah), Orpheus (Eddie
Griffin) and The Architect (George Carlin).
Once Cindy gets the
news out about the link between the videotape and the alien sightings, the dim
bulb President (Leslie Nielsen) attempts to devise a strategy plan, causing him
to ask himself, “What would President Ford do?”, as he glances at a portrait
of Harrison Ford from Air Force One in
the Hall of Presidents. If you thought Nielsen’s doctor in Airplane or Frank Drebin in The
Naked Gun were inept, believe me when I tell you that those were both warm
ups.
For me, Scary
Movie 3 was nothing less of a dynamic return to form for the spoof movie. I
can’t remember the last time a single movie, let alone a spoof movie,
contained so many priceless visual gags or lines of dialogue that are so dumb,
they’re funnier than you know what. It’s the kind of classic comedy that
only the likes of David Zucker could come up with.
Without ruining all
of the gags, allow me to share with you two particular scenes that me falling
out of my seat laughing. The first is a scene involving the sabotaging of a
newsroom teleprompter, causing a professional newsman (Jeremy Piven) to read any
and everything on the screen. What’s even more astonishing to note is that
it’s even funnier than a similar scene in Bruce
Almighty, which came out earlier in the same year.
The second scene
involves an army of hip hop stars coming together to help fight off the aliens.
Such rap artists as The Rza, Master P, Method Man, Redman and even singer Macy
Gray are strapped with guns and preparing to enter the cornfield to battle the
invading species. Then an argument erupts after one accuses another of stepping
on his shoe. It’s a moment I seriously had to rewind several times simply
because I couldn’t stop laughing.
Bottom line; if you
find yourself down and need something quick to make you laugh, then Scary
Movie 3 is the downright perfect laughter prescription. Like the early movie
spoof greats from David Zucker, it achieves in striking huge bigger-than-life
laughs in scene after scene. The third time is indeed the charm this time
around.
Video
****
Dimension scores
immensely on the video mark with this superb looking disc. The anamorphic
picture is thoroughly crisp and clear from beginning to end. Image quality is
terrifically bright and alive with large detail, with tremendous use of colors
in addition. Both light and dark scenes favor greatly. A tremendous and
outstanding job!
Audio
***1/2
For a comedy filled
minute after minute of physical gags falls, this 5.1 mix serves this particular
movie most outstandingly. The dynamic sound comes courtesy of lively music cues,
effective use of set pieces such as the club for the rap battle scene, and
frequent moments of comedic action which comes as a result of satirizing many
memorable frightful and action-filled sequences. Top-notch work all the way!
Features
****
This new Unrated
Version includes basically the same list of extras that the first release had,
but there’s plenty to go around and that’s a very good thing. In addition to
an extra five minutes of new footage, the disc includes Commentary with Director David Zucker, Producer Robert K.
Weiss, and Writers Craig Mazin and Pat Proft, Deleted and Extended Scenes with
Optional Commentary, Outtakes and Bloopers, an Alternate Ending, More Deleted
Scenes, The Making Scary Movie 3 and The Making Scary Movie 3...
FOR REAL Featurettes, and “Hulk vs. Aliens” - Behind the Scenes of the
Alternate Ending.
Summary: